When you’re not afraid to be yourself, magical things start happening. You start meeting people in unexpected places who will uplift you and reaffirm your decision to commit to yourself. Unexpected opportunities will arrive at precisely the right time.
The more I let go of fear and open myself up, the more magic creeps into my life. I’ve been focusing on genuine connection and being me rather than trying to be someone else. I swear openly, I’m more irreverent, and it’s attracting the right kind of people into my life.
When my mother and I were in Rapid City a few days ago, I bonded with my waitress at breakfast. She asked if I’d had time to figure out what I wanted to order and I responded, “Since I’m a basic bitch, I’m going to get what I always get.” She laughed and we went on to banter throughout breakfast.
She made a pun about jam and by the end of breakfast we became friends. When I went to hand her my credit card, she waved it off and said, “I had an extra coupon. We’re good.” I practically had to wrangle her to accept a tip from me.
Then she sat down at my table and we chatted about our lives. Before I left, we exchanged Snapchat handles to keep in touch. It was completely unexpected, but what a great way to start my morning!! As I walked back to the elevator, the door was wide open and waiting for me to hop on.
When we open ourselves up to good things happening in our lives, we find it everywhere we look. The same is true if we fixate on the world falling apart. What we focus on, we will see wherever we go.
Some people call it manifestation, others call it confirmation bias, but we know this phenomenon happens. When we decide life is a certain way, our brains will look for evidence to confirm this is true. The beauty is you can change your way of thinking.
You don’t have to be stuck thinking everything is crap. You can slowly begin to shift your perspective and see the world as a place full of opportunity and hidden beauty waiting to be appreciated. But how do you start?
When we come to recognize that we experience our reality through our stories about how things work, we begin to see that we can reshape those stories and reshape our reality. You start with something small.
Let’s say someone cuts you off in traffic. Maybe your usual response is to think, “What a jerk! What the hell is their problem?”
What if you allowed yourself to pause after that and think, “Hmm… maybe something else is going on in their life. Maybe they didn’t notice they cut me off because they were really worried about something, tired from working too much, or racing to get home to their kids who are sick?”
Unless we hunt that person down and demand they tell us why they cut us off in traffic, we will never know the real reason they cut us off. But we still invent stories about why they did. These stories can ruin our day or they can help us to grow our empathy.
You can apply this concept to virtually ANY story you tell in life. Most of what we experience in life can be interpreted multiple ways. These interpretations make up the stories that color how we see ourselves, others, and the world around us.
So if you want to shift your outlook in life, you start one small story at a time. And you do it with gentle kindness towards yourself instead of beating yourself up. Allow yourself to pause when you can, and use your imagination and curiosity to come up with an alternative story that serves you better.
Come join me on this wild ride. I promise you, when you do this, you will start to experience more magic in your life. You won’t want to go back.
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